The thing about change

Sometimes you just want to cry, whatever that means, whatever that would solve, you just want to cry because life is so damn confusing. You know, you could be anyone you wanted to, but then you can’t be everyone. You must be someone. You got all these hidden personality potentials in you and you’re facing a difficult time choosing. Today when you want to be something, everybody thinks you’re something, and the next day when you want to be another thing people just blow up. And then somehow you care, you care because they’re going to think you’re some sort of clown, you’re some sort of confused person. But then you begin to wonder, is it that you’re really confused or that people are just damn slow?

You can’t understand. Why can’t I be anything I want to be? Why can’t I be something today and be something else tomorrow? You keep asking yourself these questions because the world behaves funny. There are lots of potential out there, in your head, outside your head, and you want to realise these potentials. I mean, what is life if you’re just one thing and one thing only? It’s like you cease to live. When there are a lot of things, a lot of personalities you could be, then you just choose to be one person. Why?
Let’s say you’re a quiet guy, and you just be a quiet guy all your life, or you’re a calm guy and nothing seems to rile you up, you’re just being a quiet guy all your life. Don’t you want to know how it feels like to be a wild guy? Don’t you want to know how it feels like to be a street guy? Don’t you want to know how it feels like to be a banker kinda guy? You know, change is constant. I’m always wondering, people just come to the world and they just have one personality, always. Okay, you’re a super active guy, proactive guy, you like to act, you like to do stuff. But don’t you want to know how it feels to be an introvert kinda guy? Or you just continue moving in that direction of extroversion. Don’t you want to know how it feels to be an inward kinda guy? Or you’d say “It’s dumb stuff, dull stuff, you’re not into it…” It’s not enough. There’s a lot potential out there.
Don’t you want to know what everybody is? Sorry if that makes you sick of me, sorry if that makes you insecure, but I want to know how everybody feels, and I don’t know why change makes people feel so insecure. Why would you want to tag something or someone and then want that thing or person to remain the same? That is the height of arrogance! Because change is something you can’t control, something I can’t control, so why do you try so hard thinking you can control it?
So somebody is used to making funny jokes, then the person stops and starts maybe talking politics, and then you’re not happy, you’re not happy because something has changed, because someone has changed. You want a joker to keep being a joker. What are you, God? Are you the one that decides now what everyone should be? This is the arrogance that plagues us, arrogance. And then I catch myself sometimes so scared of change because I’m like how would people look at me if I change? They’d think I’m some sort of confused guy, they won’t understand that this is how the brain works sometimes, because they are suppressed, they are suppressed into being one thing, into being comfortable with whatever they are and always are. But I’m not comfortable, I like to change, I like the idea of change, both intrinsic and extrinsic. I like the idea of change, I embrace change on all levels. But then I realise that this thing called change makes people very uncomfortable. People love the status quo, people crave the status quo.
Why does change scare you so much? Change is constant. There’s morning, there’s night, there’s morning, there’s night… things are always changing. Nothing is ever still. You’re growing every day, you’re never the same, every day, every minute, every second, something changes in you, something changes around you. So why are you so scared of the very thing that you are? It’s strange, it’s funny even. I’m sharing with you because I want you to damn all consequences, damn what people think, let people look at you as confused or whatever. You can change as you wish, you can calibrate yourself as you wish, your thinking, your acting, you can do anything that you want. Okay? You’re not in this world to be only one personality, it is what we call ‘empathy’. You know, you have to empathise. How does the rich man feel? How does the beggar feel? You can’t just be one thing, because being one thing is like being dead. So that’s it, embrace change. It doesn’t hurt. It is what we are, we are change. Embrace it.


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